I sit here in great thought of events that have transpired over the past week. I revitalized this blog. I haven’t forgotten about it, I just felt nothing to write. I had several strokes. I’ve had several issues with my health when everything was looking like it was going to become better. I wanted to become better. I really did. I still do. But, there’s some nagging feeling inside of me saying that I would not.
Anyways, from the thoughts I’ve been in. I’ve had a great deal of support from this blog I have done, and I cannot thank Kate enough for encouraging me to write it. It has allowed me to give a great amount of thought into everything instead of bottling it up. I may cry when I write the posts… Okay, I usually do. I’ll admit that. But, I feel better afterwards and I don’t act out on impulse.
Keith Rhydderch, the name the readers of this blog know me as… I wanted to apologize to everyone. But, I feel I must admit. Keith Rhydderch is not my real name. You see, I’m a great fan of post-by-post role play forums. I love to write a post that is a part of an even bigger story and work over time to create a beautiful story and a rich character. Rhydderch comes from one of my favorite active characters that I have had for over two years now. Keith is my favorite male name in the English language. I had great difficulty with Keith when I was young as I had issues talking, thus is why Keith became a favorite name of mine and I find it a great deal of fun to say.
Alias. This is the title of this post. I’m hiding behind an alias. I feel bad for it, but it stops people I know personally from searching and finding about my life in such detail I’m writing here. When I was talking to Kate when I originally started this blog, the idea of an alias was a great idea as very few people can make the attachment of Keith Rhydderch to my real name. I do dislike my real name to an extent… It’s a common name, yes. But, it was so common in my years that eight kids in my school classes had it, and another few girls had a name that was similar. Way too many with my name, which is why I came to hate it because I was always referred to as and a number.
But, isn’t it funny how you age and grow up… Your name comes to fit you? Names seem to become stereotypes… And these are all intriguing stereotypes and I enjoy them all. I’m slowly coming to like my name more, and heck even my middle name even though half my family seems to have my middle name as their first name.
Alias. This blog, the krhydderch blog is everything I want to scream out at the top of my lungs to the world. This blog is the real me. This blog is not an alias. In fact, it feels like the life I’m living is an alias, hiding the real me which is this blog. I want more, I want so much more out of life. I want to break out of my alias and settle into my life. I dream of moving to a city, more liberal, and more open so I could be open myself and make and forge new friendships which I do desperately need. I would love to have a life working a great job in a city that I love… A city that I could thrive in.
I’m not a high means person. I don’t drink alcohol, because I cannot and I don’t break those doctor rules. I don’t go out on a whim to the theaters each night. I know how to cook for myself. Heck… My diet is actually cheap, because I don’t eat expensive meant all the time… Thankfully my taste for meat is a bit low. Don’t get me wrong, I see nothing wrong with eating meat. I just stopped when I was a child for a while after some recommendations and it stuck as I grew up. My entertainment needs aren’t that expensive either. I could easily live off of low means and be happy. The only thing that’s difficult, the field I want to be in is in an area that is so entirely expensive that it costs a leg and an arm to even locate there.
If I were wealthy, I would love to do what Ellen DeGeneres has her employees do. I would love to travel around the country and meet interesting people that actually need help and spend a day with them to find out what their life’s hardships are. Heck, I’d even make this a blog. But, I’m not rich… So we can dump that image out of the mind.
So. Here I am. I am hiding behind an alias in real life by pretending I’m someone I’m not. But, online… At least on this blog? I am Keith Rhydderch, an alias name that writes about real issues effecting myself.